I had been relationship-free for three years after breaking up with my former college sweetheart
and I was not looking to be hurt again by a philandering drummer. No, no, and no.So we
wrapped up our slightly tense talk.
“I’ll call you tomorrow if that’s alright?” He waited for me to answer.
“Well, I work until 5:00 and then—”
“No pressure,” he assured me. “Whenever you have time I would really like to get to know you
better. I’ll just leave a message and you can call me back at your leisure.”
He was so well-spoken and polite. He also looked me in the eye and seemed sincere. I was sure it
was all a part of a ploy to get what he wanted from me and move on to the next victim. The next
day, his call came in at 5:15 and I pressed ignore. The next day, it was the same thing. For a
whole week, Lewis tried to contact me.
The next time he saw me at church Lewis said with a confused look, “I tried to call you, but you
haven’t called me back. If you’re not interested, I’m good with that. Just let me know.” He was
very respectful and direct. I felt like he was burning holes through me with those gorgeous
brown eyes.
“I think it would be best if you didn’t call me,” I responded truthfully this time. For a moment or
two, he just looked stunned and then he said, “Oh, OK.”
And he never tried to approach me again. Nor did he peek at me from behind the cymbals. He
was done.
Skip ahead about a year. I was talking to that same youth leader after church and Lewis walked
up.
“Are you ready?” he said.
“Excuse me?” I responded.
“Not you, her.” He pointed at the wonderful young sister I looked up to.
She turned toward Lewis and said, “Sure am.” And then looked at me and smiled widely, “I’ll talk
to you later, girl. I’ve got a date.”
I watched them walk away that night. A year and a half after that, I watched them walk down the
aisle. The next year, I watched them walk in with their first baby. I also get to listen to her talk
about what a gentle, sweet, committed loving husband he is. They have a beautiful home out on
the lake and seem truly happy.
Although I’m happy for my friend and in a relationship with an awesome man of God, I learned a
valuable lesson from Lewis. You should never judge a book by its cover. You can’t size someone
up based on preconceived notions. You have to get to know that person.
Ironically, my current beau told me on our second date, “I’ve liked you for a while, but I didn’t
want to date a singer. I heard singers were a trip!”
I laughed loudly when he confessed that. Thank God he didn’t treat me like I treated Lewis. Had
he done that, he would have missed out on a beautiful relationship with a woman who truly loves
the Lord. Now that the shoe is on other foot, I realize how important it is to see past
generalizations, personal biases, and fear, and let God lead us when it comes to discovering the
right person for us.
and I was not looking to be hurt again by a philandering drummer. No, no, and no.So we
wrapped up our slightly tense talk.
“I’ll call you tomorrow if that’s alright?” He waited for me to answer.
“Well, I work until 5:00 and then—”
“No pressure,” he assured me. “Whenever you have time I would really like to get to know you
better. I’ll just leave a message and you can call me back at your leisure.”
He was so well-spoken and polite. He also looked me in the eye and seemed sincere. I was sure it
was all a part of a ploy to get what he wanted from me and move on to the next victim. The next
day, his call came in at 5:15 and I pressed ignore. The next day, it was the same thing. For a
whole week, Lewis tried to contact me.
The next time he saw me at church Lewis said with a confused look, “I tried to call you, but you
haven’t called me back. If you’re not interested, I’m good with that. Just let me know.” He was
very respectful and direct. I felt like he was burning holes through me with those gorgeous
brown eyes.
“I think it would be best if you didn’t call me,” I responded truthfully this time. For a moment or
two, he just looked stunned and then he said, “Oh, OK.”
And he never tried to approach me again. Nor did he peek at me from behind the cymbals. He
was done.
Skip ahead about a year. I was talking to that same youth leader after church and Lewis walked
up.
“Are you ready?” he said.
“Excuse me?” I responded.
“Not you, her.” He pointed at the wonderful young sister I looked up to.
She turned toward Lewis and said, “Sure am.” And then looked at me and smiled widely, “I’ll talk
to you later, girl. I’ve got a date.”
I watched them walk away that night. A year and a half after that, I watched them walk down the
aisle. The next year, I watched them walk in with their first baby. I also get to listen to her talk
about what a gentle, sweet, committed loving husband he is. They have a beautiful home out on
the lake and seem truly happy.
Although I’m happy for my friend and in a relationship with an awesome man of God, I learned a
valuable lesson from Lewis. You should never judge a book by its cover. You can’t size someone
up based on preconceived notions. You have to get to know that person.
Ironically, my current beau told me on our second date, “I’ve liked you for a while, but I didn’t
want to date a singer. I heard singers were a trip!”
I laughed loudly when he confessed that. Thank God he didn’t treat me like I treated Lewis. Had
he done that, he would have missed out on a beautiful relationship with a woman who truly loves
the Lord. Now that the shoe is on other foot, I realize how important it is to see past
generalizations, personal biases, and fear, and let God lead us when it comes to discovering the
right person for us.
Did he say pastor’s kid? Oh noooo, that was
strike two! I guess my internal dialogue must
have affected my facial expression, because he
interjected, “I hope I didn’t scare you with the
PK confession. I think you’re judging me based
on that. Didn’t God say we’re not supposed to
judge?”
“Stop grinning!” My mind was screaming at me,
but my mannerisms were slowly betraying my
intentions. This guy was a charmer, but
quickly, I pulled it together. I was not about to
be taken by those gorgeous dimples and wavy
hair on top of his head.
strike two! I guess my internal dialogue must
have affected my facial expression, because he
interjected, “I hope I didn’t scare you with the
PK confession. I think you’re judging me based
on that. Didn’t God say we’re not supposed to
judge?”
“Stop grinning!” My mind was screaming at me,
but my mannerisms were slowly betraying my
intentions. This guy was a charmer, but
quickly, I pulled it together. I was not about to
be taken by those gorgeous dimples and wavy
hair on top of his head.
When I turned around, I noticed that the voice belonged to the drummer. “Just great,” I thought
as I faked a smile. “Can you hold on for just a second?” I asked in a slightly condescending tone
without waiting for an answer.
I turned my back toward him, took my sweet time finishing up my conversation with the youth
leader—I wished he would just leave. But he waited patiently.
“I’m sorry about that,” I apologized generically, hoping he would be turned off by my lukewarm
attitude. I knew I should have been behaving better, but I had already erected my wall of
defense.
“Oh it’s no problem at all,” he replied, flashing a set of perfectly straight, gleaming white teeth.
His 6’ 2” athletic frame towered over me as he extended his hand downward to shake mine. “My
name is Lewis and I’ve been noticing you for some time. I was wondering if it would be alright if I
called you.”
“Sure, you can call me,” I heard myself say—although, I meant to say no and tell Lewis I wasn’t
at all interested. It was too late by then, so we pulled out our phones and exchanged numbers on
the spot.
“I’ve only been seeing you for a few months,” he remarked while thumbing his Blackberry
keypad. “I’m the pastor’s son and I keep inventory on the membership,” he chuckled.
as I faked a smile. “Can you hold on for just a second?” I asked in a slightly condescending tone
without waiting for an answer.
I turned my back toward him, took my sweet time finishing up my conversation with the youth
leader—I wished he would just leave. But he waited patiently.
“I’m sorry about that,” I apologized generically, hoping he would be turned off by my lukewarm
attitude. I knew I should have been behaving better, but I had already erected my wall of
defense.
“Oh it’s no problem at all,” he replied, flashing a set of perfectly straight, gleaming white teeth.
His 6’ 2” athletic frame towered over me as he extended his hand downward to shake mine. “My
name is Lewis and I’ve been noticing you for some time. I was wondering if it would be alright if I
called you.”
“Sure, you can call me,” I heard myself say—although, I meant to say no and tell Lewis I wasn’t
at all interested. It was too late by then, so we pulled out our phones and exchanged numbers on
the spot.
“I’ve only been seeing you for a few months,” he remarked while thumbing his Blackberry
keypad. “I’m the pastor’s son and I keep inventory on the membership,” he chuckled.
EMAIL:
Kennisha Hill is the author of the Christian
Fiction a freelance magazine writer. She
lives in Dallas, Texas and is happily
married with two children. Learn more by
visiting her website at kennishahill.com or
her Facebook page at Facebook.com/
kennisha.hill.
Email Kennisha:
khill@eewmagazine.com
Connect on Facebook
Facebook.com
Fiction a freelance magazine writer. She
lives in Dallas, Texas and is happily
married with two children. Learn more by
visiting her website at kennishahill.com or
her Facebook page at Facebook.com/
kennisha.hill.
Email Kennisha:
khill@eewmagazine.com
Connect on Facebook
Facebook.com
| BI-WEEKLY COLUMNS |
“Uh, excuse me. Can I talk to you for a minute?”
The deep voice from behind me startled me, because I was totally engrossed in a conversation
with one of the youth department leaders. I really admired this woman. She was young,
beautiful, and really loved God. She was telling me about an event she was planning for the
youth ministry and asking me to sing. I’ve been singing in church since I was five years old and I
enjoy worshiping God through music. So I told my her I would be honored to help out by
participating.
The deep voice from behind me startled me, because I was totally engrossed in a conversation
with one of the youth department leaders. I really admired this woman. She was young,
beautiful, and really loved God. She was telling me about an event she was planning for the
youth ministry and asking me to sing. I’ve been singing in church since I was five years old and I
enjoy worshiping God through music. So I told my her I would be honored to help out by
participating.
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June 21-July 5
| EEWMAGAZINE.COM |
I would always catch him staring at me from
behind the cymbals on the black drum set.
Each time I caught his gaze, I would quickly
whip my head away in the opposite direction.
Musicians were on my “Do Not Date” list.
He was a really cute guy and all, but too
many of my friends had been hurt by so-
called saved musicians in the church. A lot of
them would be playing in church on Sunday,
after being in the club on Saturday night.
Trust me, I had heard horror stories and I
wanted no parts of that.
Aside from tales from the club, one of my
favorite aunts, Kathy, would tell me “Baby,
musicians can’t be trusted. They always
cheat honey--always.” For me, if Aunt Kathy
said it, it was gospel. She had been divorced
three times already—twice from musicians—
so she should know, I assumed.
behind the cymbals on the black drum set.
Each time I caught his gaze, I would quickly
whip my head away in the opposite direction.
Musicians were on my “Do Not Date” list.
He was a really cute guy and all, but too
many of my friends had been hurt by so-
called saved musicians in the church. A lot of
them would be playing in church on Sunday,
after being in the club on Saturday night.
Trust me, I had heard horror stories and I
wanted no parts of that.
Aside from tales from the club, one of my
favorite aunts, Kathy, would tell me “Baby,
musicians can’t be trusted. They always
cheat honey--always.” For me, if Aunt Kathy
said it, it was gospel. She had been divorced
three times already—twice from musicians—
so she should know, I assumed.
| Written By Tamela Washington |